Octo as Angie
In case you had a little too much faith in humanity today, here's Octomom, born Nadya Suleman (and with a different face), posing as Angelina Jolie.
How Touching
Octomom, aka Nadya Suleman, can now add Adult Video News Award winner to her expansive resume -- she won the AVN win for Best Celebrity Sex Tape this weekend, and you just know her eleventymillion kids will be super-proud of that someday.
Back on the Dole
Octomom has been slow to learn what many parents know all too well: Kids are expensive, especially when you have more than a dozen of them.
Proving the point? She's back on welfare.
Let's Focus on Me
As if he wasn't unhinged enough, Michael Lohan is now claiming that he helped Octomom -- aka Nadya Suleman -- get on the path to rehab to kick her Xanax addiction.
Through his super-secret non-profit organization in Florida, of course. So that's a thing.
What a Pill
For Octomom Nadya Suleman, life is stressful. She has 14 children and can't quite seem to choose a career path -- one day it's soft-core porn, and the next, she gets paid to argue with people.
Seems all that baby-birthing and porn-doing and position-taking has caught up with her, though, because she…
War of the Witless
Forget President Obama vs. Mitt Romney and their trite discussions of health care, job creation and the plight of the middle class. Octomom, nee Nadya Suleman, has abandoned her thriving career in creepy soft-core porn and is now America's foremost debater.