Olympian Ryan Lochte was given his own reality show called 'What Would Ryan Lochte Do?,' prompting many to hilariously wonder what the lost-for-words athlete actually would do.

Judging from last night's premiere ... not much.

If you plan to catch up on a rerun, prepare yourself for thought-provoking flubs like, "These are my shoes that I design from top to the very soul to the very top to the bottom. No. F---. Laces."

In the April 21 premiere, we learned that Ryan can wink with both his eyes, that he takes his many dates to the exact same restaurant, and that his favorite movie is 'What Woman Want.' (No, that's not a typo -- he thinks that's the title of the Mel Gibson movie 'What Women Want.')

We also learned that despite designing his shoes with his name on the bottom and bragging about wearing a $200,000 watch, Lochte is sincerely confused about the meaning of the word "douchebag."

“What’s being talked about a lot is ‘Ryan Lochte the American Douchebag.’ Douchebag? I don’t even know, what is a douchebag?" he mused. "Like what is it? What’s the definition of it? Like, I really don’t know what it means. Do you know?”

Maybe watching the video above will help clarify things for him. But if you aren't convinced, keep in mind he's named his friends/entourage the Lochterage.

Remember when he just swam and won medals and was pretty?

Good times.

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