Charlie Sheen appeared on the 'The Tonight Show with Jay Leno' Wednesday night (Jan. 30) to promote his show 'Anger Management' -- and to rant about the one time he met performance enhancing drug-using cyclist Lance Armstrong.

"He's kind of a douche. Wow, I didn't just say that, did I? Sorry Lance ... That's based on meeting him," Sheen told Leno.

Charlie then launched into a story about the first time he met Armstrong, who couldn't be bothered to say hi to his fellow black-sheep peer, only mustering an unimpressed “that's nice” when Sheen introduced himself.

"Sorry to bother you, Captain Bitchin'. You know, whatever ... Go get a paper route, dude," Sheen spat at an imaginary Lance.

Things then took a turn to the scandal discussion, with Leno explaining that by lying in the first place, Armstrong sullied the lives of his accusers (many of whom he took to court and sued).

"That was creepy. If he was a better guy I think in his life, he'd be forgiven a lot faster and a lot easier - kinda like me," Charlie said to an applauding audience.

Sheen has definitely racked up some karmic bonuses lately, donating cash to sick cancer patients, helping out a destitute Lindsay Lohan and pitching in for the funeral of the photographer who died trying to snap a shot of Justin Bieber.

Maybe that's why he still gets to bang porn stars and party with Johnny Depp.

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