Upon learning that he was hosting the 2013 Oscars, Seth MacFarlane claims his reaction was simple: "It's an honor that everyone else said no."

MacFarlane mocked the pomp and circumstance of the Oscars, but he still showed the Academy Awards grace and respect. Though this was not one of the Comedy Central roasts that the 'Family Guy' creator was used to, he still killed it.

His opener was a line that he'll be hardpressed to top throughout the show: "The quest to make Tommy Lee Jones laugh begins now."

When the camera panned to Jones, it showed that MacFarlane succeeded.

Jones' Kristen Stewart-like permascowl wasn't the only elephant in the room that MacFarlane brought into the light.

The host addressed 'Argo' and Ben Affleck's snub with a pointed remark: "The information was so confidential that director is unknown to the Academy ... Ben, it's not your fault. They screwed up."

Hey, Academy? How about some aloe for that burn?

MacFarlane poked fun at the Coppolas and their massive success, at Daniel Day-Lewis' staying in character as Abraham Lincoln (using technology and slavery jokes) and at 'Django Unchained': "This movie is about a man trying to save his wife from unthinkable violence. Or as Chris Brown and Rihanna put it, a date movie ... There's a lot of talk about use of the n-word in the film. I hear it was based on Mel Gibson's voicemails."

On Jennifer Lawrence, McFarlane cracked, "Whether she wins or loses, it's just an honor that Meryl Streep wasn't nominated." (Clearly someone watched J. Law's speech at the Golden Globes.)

None of this was good enough for William Shatner, who came on in a TV from the future on a mission to prevent MacFarlane "from destroying the Academy Awards." Shatner snapped, "Your jokes are tasteless and everyone hates you. Why couldn't Tina and Amy host? Why can't Tina and Amy host everything?"

MacFarlane, in a faux flashback, broke into song about topless scenes with a refrain that was simple, catchy and unforgettable: "We saw your boobs!"

Shatner encouraged McFarlane to sing a traditional Oscar-winning tune to celebrate the movies, and Channing Tatum and Charlize Theron joined him onstage to perform 'The Way You Look Tonight.' Tatum and Theron busted ballet and ballroom moves, and it was seriously the classiest thing we've ever seen since Forest Whitaker's reaction to a deli's stop and frisk.

MacFarlane's next imaginary faux flashback was a remake of 'Flight' using sock puppets. To compensate for the imaginary failure, Daniel Radcliffe and Joseph Gordon-Levitt came out to dance and sing 'High Hopes' with MacFarlane. It was the classiest thing we've ever seen since Theron and Tatum's dance.

In another flashback, MacFarlane dresses as a flying nun and insults Sally Field ... and then hooks up with her. Seriously.

To compensate for that transgression, MacFarlane, surrounded by women in gold and yellow dresses, as well as previous partners Radcliffe, Gordon-Levitt, Tatum and Theron sang an Oscar-themed rendition of 'Beauty and the Beast' classic 'Be Our Guest.' It was the classiest thing we've ever seen since Radcliffe and Gordon-Levitt's dance -- and an appropriate opening number, since MacFarlane is proving, in terms of Oscar hosts, to be the belle of the ball.

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