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James Franco Reviewed ‘The Place Beyond the Pines’ But Was Totally Distracted by Ryan Gosling’s Bod

Stephen Lovekin / Atsushi Tomura, Getty Images

James Franco thinks Ryan Gosling is a hunka-hunka burning love. After seeing Gosling’s pre-hiatus film, ‘The Place Beyond the Pines,’ he had a whole lot to gush about — and most of it pertained to the star’s body.

Hey, Franco. Welcome to the party. Now go get the rest of us some drinks.

In his Huffington Post review titled ‘Burning for Gosling,’ Franco refers to his fellow actor as “the smoking, brooding carnival king who will ride his motorcycle like no other into the burning twilight of legend.”

“Yes, please, more of this,” he continues, practically squealing in girlish glee. “Look at how he smokes; look at the other t-shirts he wears inside out; look at the holes!”

Don’t worry, James paid attention to the rest of the film too — he was just notably distracted every time Gosling graced the screen with his presence. Which is, you know, kind of understandable.

“I loved the whole film and was engaged every moment of the way,” Franco says. “But what I want to talk about is the first section, the Gosling section; I want to make love to this section.”

And just in case the quotes we’ve pulled weren’t homoerotic enough for you, we leave you with this description:

“The first image we see is Gos’s toned six-pack, framed tight so that his head is cut off in order to focus our attention on the full spread of idiosyncratic tattoos … we still haven’t seen his face but we know it’s the Gos: the hair, the head, the strut.”

Man. It’s almost like he’s photoshopped or something.

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