Chelsea Handler Thinks Taylor Swift Is a Virgin and Angelina Jolie Is a Demon
Never one for holding her acerbic tongue, Chelsea Handler is releasing her vitriol once more, this time in an interview on Bravo’s ‘Watch What Happens Live.’
We’ll start with her latest takedown of Jolie — the soon-to-be Mrs. Brad Pitt, the humanitarian, the Oscar winner, the mother of six.
“She seems like a demon,” Handler, BFF to Jennifer Aniston, snapped (quotes via Us Weekly). “[My feelings have] nothing to do with Jennifer. As a woman, I know when you see somebody walking across the room that’s a bad girl,” she quipped.
“I just don’t like Angelina Jolie. I don’t think she’s a girl’s girl. I like girl’s girls!”
Handler has previously called Jolie a “f—ing c—” and “insincere,” so all things considered, her latest comments were relatively mild.
At the same time, while Swift is a girl’s girl — and a self-professed one at that — Handler is somewhat side-eyeing her, too, for saying Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are going to hell for poking fun at her during the Golden Globes.
“I think that was a bold statement, but I’m not on anyone’s side because I just don’t care enough,” Handler insisted. But that didn’t stop her from expounding on it anyway.
“I like that she’s being that vociferous [because] she thinks they were out to get her. They were clearly making a joke just about her demeanor, which is embarrassing,” Handler admitted. “I mean, she’s just dated so many men.”
Handler then talked about Swift’s sex life, because the world can’t seem to decide on which end of the Madonna-slut spectrum Taylor actually resides. (Madonna as in the Virgin Mary, not the ‘Like a Virgin’ singer. Because the latter has made it pretty clear where she stands on all that.)
“My theory about Taylor Swift is that she’s a virgin, that everyone breaks up with her because they date her for two weeks and she’s like, ‘I’m not gonna do it.’ And they’re like, ‘Oh, well, forget it. Then I don’t want to date you,'” Handler said, seemingly criticizing more the men who date Taylor than Taylor herself.
“Every guy thinks they’re going to devirginize her, and they’re not. She’s never going to get devirginized, ever, ever, ever, ever.”
Like, you know, ever.