Ryan Anderson is a humorist and writer with a degree in journalism and philosophy that just sits in a box in his attic. You can read more of his musings here: http://www.twitter.com/kolchak
Ryan Anderson
To the Surprise of No One, Some ‘Bachelorette’ Suitors Use Steroids
Boiled down to its essence, 'The Bachelorette' is a program about beautiful, lumbering nitwits vying for the attention of a beautiful, vapid woman. Oftentimes that means trying to impress her by sheer swag, but one past contestant is saying that many go to extremes and turn to steroids to get an edge.
Donald Trump Fearlessly Defends Bikinis from All Enemies, Foreign + Domestic [VIDEO]
When Donald Trump made a random appearance on Fox & Friends on Monday, June 10 (just because he could), he was asked the most pressing of questions: What did he think about the Miss World competition removing the bikini portion of its contest due to complaints from the Muslim community in Indonesia, where the pageant is being held?
Ron Howard Narrating Twitter Users’ Lives ‘Arrested Development’-Style Is Utter Brilliance
Since the premiere of 'Arrested Development' a decade ago, people worldwide have come to love Ron Howard's narration of the exploits of the Bluth family. (He's much better than lots of other narrators. Seriously. Some of those guys are just garbage.) But as much as fans wanted to be Bluths, they weren't.
But that slightly changed today (June 10), when Ron took to Twitter to read tweets with the ha
John Malkovich Helped Save a Man’s Life
We all know it's pretty awesome being John Malkovich, but this weekend it got pretty heroic, too, after he saved a man bleeding to death on a Toronto street.
Karma Catches Up with Simon Cowell as He’s Pelted With Eggs on ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ [VIDEO]
Simon Cowell is used to people not appreciating his opinions. But during the finale of 'Britain's Got Talent' on Saturday (June 8), one previously rejected contestant decided she'd take his feedback over easy and pelted him with raw eggs.
Amanda Bynes Might Actually Get That Hip-Hop Record Deal She Wants
When Amanda Bynes first mentioned something about getting a record contract for a rap album, everyone just assumed she was mouthing off as usual. She may as well have said she was starting a boarding house for three-toed sloths.
But at least one company has taken her seriously, and is now offering her a deal. To rap about ugly people, we assume.
Field Report: That One Time I Met Farrah Abraham [PHOTOS]
My home state of Wisconsin is not a pinnacle of excitement. Occasionally something interesting will happen, but it usually involves a serial killer. So when I heard that Farrah Abraham was going to be visiting the state capital as part of her cross-country meet-and-greet tour, I knew I had to go...
Russell Crowe, Paris Hilton, Kelly Clarkson + More in Celebrity Tweets of the Day
Today (June 7) celebrities lost pets, sought pastries, met other celebrities, learned to tweet and got their Vine on.
Lindsay Lohan (Finally) Pays Off Her Lawyer and Savior Shawn Holley
Shawn Holley has saved Lindsay Lohan's ass more times than anyone can count. So when Holley graciously accepted the troubled starlet back as a client, her first order of business was to make sure Lindsay paid the massive amount of money she still owed.
And in a bizarre twist? The ladies are now square.
Kate Upton’s Scene-Stealing Boobs Are Two Huddled Masses, Yearning to Be Free [PHOTOS]
Kate Upton is everywhere lately. So it's no surprise that she's been cast in 'The Other Woman,' a romantic comedy in which she and Cameron Diaz discover they are mistresses of Leslie Mann's husband.
But none of that is necessary to appreciate these pictures, because you'll forget the plot in seconds.
Now That Liam Hemsworth Is on Twitter, Let the Rampant Speculation Begin
Realizing it was 2013 and he has multiple movies that need plugging, Liam Hemsworth finally caved and joined Twitter, giving him yet another platform to stonewall fan questions about his relationship with Miley Cyrus.
Justin Bieber Steals a Paparazzo’s Camera, Continues His Rapid Descent into Thugdom [AUDIO]
Justin Bieber is back to his old tricks again, flipping out on a paparazzo for doing his job and ordering his goons to steal the man's camera like a respectable artist would.
Al Roker, Jenna Fischer, Andy Cohen + More in Celebrity Tweets of the Day
Today (June 6) celebrities recovered from trauma, aired laundry, tempted death, reached ceasefires and tweeted without hands.
After Paparazzi Photos of Kim Kardashian Get Ugly, She Gets Ugly with the Paparazzi
Professional attentionista Kim Kardashian likes to have her picture taken so much, she calls paparazzi and lets them know where she is. But today she suddenly soured on photogs, claiming that they threatened both her and the little gestating Khristy.
Farrah Abraham Isn’t Allowed to Drink for the Next Six Months
As we told you previously, Farrah Abraham pled guilty to her Nebraska DUI charges. But now the horrific terms of her deal are coming to light: She won't be able to booze it up for a full six months.
‘Girls Gone Wild’ Honcho Joe Francis Has a Sex Tape Floating Around
The tables have turned for Joe Francis, whose bad decisions have come back to haunt him like one of his very own girls gone wild after footage of him having sex was stolen.
Some Dude Slashed His Wrists in Front of the ‘Today’ Show Audience [PHOTO, VIDEO]
A man attempted to commit suicide -- or at least garner a lot of attention -- in front of a live taping of the 'Today' show. And while the program has been in a ratings slump, this probably wasn't what it had to mind to fix that.
Deepak Chopra, Kesha, Fairuza Balk + More in Celebrity Tweets of the Day
Today (June 5) celebrities decided to move, rocked out with cats, kept tweeting, supported each other and fought bullies.
Dina Lohan Drank a Whole Bunch, Pledged Some Money to Charity – And Stiffed Everyone [VIDEO]
It's difficult to tally all the accounts floating about of Dina Lohan not paying for things, so what difference does one more make?
John Travolta Is Crashing Weddings Now [PHOTOS]
Seems John Travolta can't get enough early summer lovin,' because the actor made a surprise appearance at a Georgia couple's wedding after a chance meeting with the duo the night before.