Prince

Prince wrote the score for the musical 'How To Not Succeed in Business While Really Trying.' Okay, not really, but he might as well have if he thinks he doesn't need the internet to stay relevant.

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Prince never worked with or knew Michael Jackson, but he may still testify against the tour promoter who both hired and was supposed to supervise Michael's doctor, Conrad Murray, because that's how the American justice system works.

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You already knew Prince was kind of an adorable weirdo, but specific oddities about the Purple One popped up in a recent Billboard interview that will either leave you scratching your head, wanting to high five him, rolling your eyes -- or any combination thereof.

The TLDR version: Prince hates Madonna, old people, cover songs and when reporters take notes or record things. But he totally loves his all-black, all-female legal team. So there's that.

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Forget everything you know about Prince for a moment. Forget that he once changed his name to an unpronounceable symbol, forget that we all had to refer to him as “The Artist Formerly Known As” or “The Artist” during that time, and forget that he's basically Jimi Hendrix reincarnated.

Basically, forget all of 'Purple Rain' and how doves sound when they cry -- because Prince has reinvented himself for the 21st century with his new song 'Screwdriver.' Which we're sure has no double entendre meaning at all.

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Alright, look — we all know Prince is short. Dude's been rocking heeled boots for as long as we've known his name, but we didn't know he was that tiny. He's shorter than the Olsen twins, for God's sake.

But

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