Jessica Simpson, who hasn't spoken to her ex-husband Nick Lachey in six years, is reportedly furious that Lachey went on Bravo's 'Watch What Happens Live' and told anyone with cable that Joe Simpson used to grab his ass at family functions.
See, it's funny because it totally might be true.
Chelsea Handler, host of 'Chelsea Lately,' went on 'Conan' to talk to Conan O'Brien about their recent nude shower sketch -- which Handler credits as putting O'Brien on the sexy map -- and a run-in with Jessica Simpson's baby shower.
Jessica Simpson's mom jeans were an epic style disaster. She donned the high-waisted denim back in 2009, and they were so bad that people are still chattering about them.
We almost forgot that Ashlee Simpson was famous, but apparently the younger Simpson sister is maintaining relevance through the nepotism that got her here in the first place and latching onto big sis Jessica for support.
Seems Ashlee's partying has reportedly gotten so out of control that Papa Joe and mom Tina Simpson have recruited Jessica to keep an eye on her troubled little sis. (You know, when Jessica's not busy getting pregnant and wondering how it all happened.)
Jessica Simpson remained adorable and candid in a sitdown with Jimmy Kimmel to promote 'Fashion Star,' and she revealed more than she bargained for -- including the sex of her baby -- in her typically charming, foot-in-mouth fashion.
Jessica Simpson seemed to think Gale Norton was the US Secretary of Interior Design. We hope the Secretary of Homeland Security was able to watch her house and water her plants while she was away.
Upcoming two-time mama Jessica Simpson seems determined to spawn a collection of oddly-named babies. After giving her first child (a girl) the male moniker of Maxwell Drew, she's now thinking about calling her second child Ace.
Thus predestining the kid to be a race car driver. Or a high-stakes poker player. Or a greaser who hangs out behind the school cafeteria with a best bud named Soda Pop.
Gwyneth Paltrow, tired of raking in millions to be one of the most overrated actresses in Hollywood, would rather focus her time on building her own empire of expensive things no one really needs. Just like Jessica Simpson.
Seems there's a lot of ice skating going on in hell these days, because serial-dater John Mayer finally admitted he exhibited some douche-like behavior to his former lady loves Jessica Simpson, Jennifer Aniston and Taylor Swift.
As you probably know by now, Jessica Simpson is pregnant again, but it's totally not her fault. Her egg was just sitting there minding its own business when fiance Eric Johnson's sperm rudely decided to inseminate it without even asking.
And that's how babies are made. Thanks, Jess!
