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Lindsay Lohan Looks for Love + Designated Drivers for Funny Or Die [VIDEO]

Lindsay Lohan is looking for a lover in her Funny or Die eHarmony video, which is actually pretty charmingly self-aware.

“I’m recently single … I think,” she said. “And I’m looking for someone I can spend the rest of my life with. Or the rest of my probation with.”

“I would define my personality as … creative, a bit of a night owl, a workaholic, a shopaholic and, according to the state of California, an alcoholic,” she continues. “As well as a threat to all security guards if they work in hotels.”

Aside from her legal and substance abuse problems, Lohan also touches on her financial woes, explaining, “I’m not broke … I have $400 in the bank and 20,000 Marlboro Miles, which I’m very proud of.”

Tune in to see what she’s looking for in a mate … and to mourn her, because while self-effacing, she’s also sadly a little dead behind the eyes these days.

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