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World’s Smallest Violin Plays as Kristen Stewart Ponders Her Mortality in the Digital Age

Francois Durand, Getty Images

Robert Pattinson didn’t kill his girlfriend and ‘Twilight’ co-star Kristen Stewart for cheating on him this summer, but the pouty, perpetually-dour actress is still pondering her mortality — and worrying that fame itself just might be the death of her.

When the cheating scandal broke, KStew dealt with a rash of negative press and hate mail from crazy passionate Twihards. And in an interview that appears in an e-book titled ‘Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Taylor Lautner — In Their Own Words,’ Stewart says her accessibility via digital means like Facebook and Twitter freaks her out.

“Nowadays it’s harder because everyone is on Facebook and everyone knows where you are all the time, and everyone’s twittering,” she commented, aging before our very eyes by using the word “twittering” instead of “tweeting.”

She continued, “[I’m afraid] I’m going to die because somebody is going to say where I am and somebody is going to kill me. Someone’s going to twitter my location and then it’s going to be like, boom.”

Really? That’s how it’s gonna go down?

All of us — even the lowly non-famous — can choke on a pretzel or cross the street and get smashed by an errant bus. Yeah, stalkers are a real problem, but that’s what your security team is for, Kristen.

Have a glass of wine and roll around in your cash for a while. You’ll feel better.

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