Of all of the legitimate reasons to dislike HBO's 'Girls' -- the mediocre acting, the mediocre writing, the inexplicable lack of minorities in Brooklyn, N.Y., the hipster stereotypes, the ubiquitous hype, the innumerable connections of the cast and crew -- Howard Stern doesn't like it because Lena Dunham doesn't quite resemble a stick figure.

Quelle surprise. Thankfully, the show's creator and star didn't take his body snarking too seriously.

Stern's insightful criticisms included, "It's a little fat girl who kinda looks like Jonah Hill and she keeps taking her clothes off and it kind of feels like rape."

Wait. Voluntarily watching a TV show, knowing you could hit "mute," "power" or simply change the channel at any time feels like being forced against your will to have sex? Tell us more, Stern.

"She seems -- it's like -- I don't want to see that."

Okay, so he just doesn't know what rape is.

"I learned that this little fat chick writes the show and directs the show and that makes sense to me because she's such a camera hog that the other characters barely are on," he added.

And that's rape. Seeing a little fat chick on TV. Not being roofied, held down against your will or held up with a weapon while someone violates you. Dude, seriously?

"My opinion, if I was a producer on that, I'd say, 'Honey, you're a little too close to the project. You need to allow the other characters to breathe a little and let us get invested in them.'"

Still, Stern added the classy, ultra backhanded kudos: "Good for her. It's hard for little fat chicks to get anything going."

Somehow, Dunham responded without calling for Stern's castration. Bless her for it:

"I did find out that Howard Stern really hates [Girls], which I'm a Howard Stern fan, and I believe he's earned the right to free speech and he should go for it," she told David Letterman (quotes via Us Weekly).

She added, rather amiably, "I wanna get it on my gravestone where he said, 'Congrats to her (Dunham). It's so hard for little fat chicks to get anything going these days."

If Dunham could apply the same level of humor and humbleness to her own series, she might have more fans. Maybe not Stern, but we don't think anyone would miss him.

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