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Turns Out the Woman Marrying a Cardboard Robert Pattinson Isn’t Totally Clinical After All

Robert Pattinson
Love Is Overtaking Me

Marrying a cardboard likeness of Edward Cullen might not be as crazy as it sounds. Okay, it’s kind of crazy, but not in the “I want to give birth like Bella and have my husband bite my baby’s umbilical cord off with his teeth” crazy.

Instead, graduate student Lauren Adkins is tying the knot with the cardboard Edward (not to be confused with the cardboard performance Robert Pattinson gives as an emotionless sparkly vampire) as a commentary on the way fandom affects our notion of romantic love.

Stay with us here.

According to Adkin’s thesis, which can be found on her website Love Is Overtaking Me:

“This work focuses on the female escapist fantasy in its most popular forms—primarily finding “true love”—and the extent to which it seeps into our real lives. I’ve looked at this fantasy primarily through a pop cultural lens; that is I’ve used film & television’s representations of the love story and female characters in general in an attempt to understand my own expectations of romantic love.

Because of personal attachment to and experience with this fantasy or quest, which took a particularly strong hold of me when I discovered the intensely popular ‘Twilight Saga,’ my thesis exhibition will touch on romantic expectation primarily through the main love interest, Edward Cullen.”

Of course not everyone understands the point Adkins is trying to make, and as a result her Facebook page was bombarded with comments like “freak,” “mental slut” and “”She must b fat and ugly can’t get a real man has to marry a cardboard cutout how pathetic is that.”

Sounds like some people are jealous that they didn’t think to marry Cardboard Cullen first.

“Part of my point is that this character does not exist. This character is not real. It creates an expectation that we have engrained in us and I think it’s dangerous,” Adkins explains of her exhibition, which will explore the hostile nature toward female-driven fandom.

Money to pay for Adkin’s thesis exhibition — which will feature an invitation-only Las Vegas wedding ceremony and a reception that’s open to the public — was raised online. The $1,235 in donations paid for the dress, the his-and-her rings, wedding cake, tent, tables and chairs, dinnerware, candles, centerpieces, flower arrangements, and food and drinks.

The main event will take place at the Viva Las Vegas Chapel on Jan. 26, and the whole thing will be live-streamed across the internet for all to enjoy. Or to mock, if you so choose.

Best wishes and caviar dreams, Lauren and Edward. Try not to get any paper cuts on the honeymoon.

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